Hey What's Happenings? Everything Groovy?

hey whats the happenings?,everything groovy? do you have any psycho neighbors? anyone that drools and grins foolishly? crosseyed janitors in the local schools? local morons hired and employed by macdonalds? the reason i am asking is the pedestrian church needs security guards, we will arm those that meet all or some of the above standards, they also have to smell, i dont mean sniff out possible threats they have to SMELL!! BADLY! the most odorous drooling low IQ mentally challenged will get first chance for a security guard position. a verbal test is required however, questions will be like: DO farts have lumps? if they do did you just shit your pants? the church is looking for the best possible security system available, screw electronic surveliance, live morons chained to trees, shrubbery, fences, mailboxes, or anything on the property should be sufficient. arming them with pitchforks, machetes, water ballons full of shit, should be a great deterrent to any intruders. anyone captured however unlikely will be placed in a large cage full of quail and dick cheney our vice president armed with an uzi! ranches in texas quail hunting areas frequented by our vice president are full of shallow graves. he and the president do fit most of the criteria to become guards for the pedestrian church
walk proudly
the good reverend
fadda ken
pope of the pedestrian church
lord of western florida
humbly!!
anyone knowing of any morons, friends that you would like to see chained to trees etc., politicians or ex spouses contact the good reverend @ this site!!! photos of applicants and a short resume listing thier qualifications are acceptable!! remember you cant libel garbage by saying it stinks!!!